Following last week’s discussion of putting youth in crisis mode as a way to stretch their faith and help them grow, it’s worth talking about how we treat/work with the young adults in youth ministry.
Whether that’s volunteer leaders, upperclassmen, or transitioning the graduating senior class off to the next step, it’s an important thing to consider.
Mark Oestreicher shared some thoughts on our culture’s “extended adolescence“– the idea that we’re holding off giving young people responsibilities for as long as possible, which leads to a sort to delayed adulthood. Kids stay kids for longer, regardless of their actual age.
Here’s what Marko had to say:
the turn is this: since i’ve become very unconvinced that the whole teenage brain thing is a nature thing (god’s design, you might say), and is more likely to be a nurture thing (the result of our collective restrictions on young adults, keeping them from moving into adulthood, or using their brains as adults). and, as i’m buying into the notion that young adults (and even teenagers – particularly older teenagers) are fully capable – whether behavioral indicators show this or not – of “being adult”, i’m forced to wrestle with a few things:1. extended adolescence is not the fault of young adults. sure, there are slackers. i’m guessing there always have been. but i think it’s wiser for us to examine ourselves, our culture, our churches, our homes, and stop pointing the finger of judgement at 20-somethings. we’ve – collectively – created the culture that isolates teenagers and young adults from adults and adulthood; we’ve created extended adolescence. they’re merely living into our expectations (“you’re not yet an adult”).2. it does seem to be possible (based on what i’m reading and what i’ve seen) for post-high school teenagers and young 20-somethings to step into adulthood, in some cases very quickly, to reverse the extended adolescent trend, or at least side-step it. i’m not talking about those outliers who naturally move into adulthood “early” (by today’s norms), and would have in any culture, in any era; i’m talking about an average 18 or 21 year old newly leaning into the capabilities they already possess. what is required? in short: meaningful responsibility and expectation.
We have to agree with Marko when he says that youth, including teens, are fully capable of “being adults.” (And if you have any doubts, check out stories coming from the “kids” on the World Race.) Yet culture as a whole has a tendency to hold them back — see the uproar when one school eliminated the D and forced students to get a 70 in order to pass a class. How is that preparing them for the responsibilities of the future?
Not to wax poetic about the “good old days,” but responsibility used to start at a young age. For example, take Daniel Webster. You may know Dan from his dictionary. He went to high school at the age of 14, which wasn’t too unusual. What was unusual was that his teacher, Joseph Buckminster, was a 12-year-old. That’s right, the guy that wrote the dictionary was mentored by a pre-teen. And the faculty at the boarding school wasn’t afraid of giving someone with talent that kind of responsibility.
John Quincy Adams (6th president of the U.S.) started his political career at the age of 14 when he was appointed ambassador to Russia.
And Jesus was just 12 when he started sharing insights, teaching some of the best religious minds of the day.
Even if teens in your youth group aren’t ready to become ambassadors or start replacing college professors, they’re looking for responsibility. Giving a young person responsibility is a way of showing you trust them. It’s telling them they’re worth the task they’re given and that they have a role on the team.
How do you give youth responsibility? Do you encourage them to step up into bigger roles? Are the tasks you give your leaders challenging enough? What are they teaching you?
(Image from Jason Dunn)
